RE: Blogger

why do you think i take the time to tell people about this

random.choice(lnks)

But, I will.

sen·ior

 - a student in the final year at a high school, preparatory school, college, or university.

Wait, what?

That's not me?

It is?

Whoa, wait a minute?

Where did the time go?

Yes, Taylor, that is you. whether you believe it or not, it is. This is your graduating year, your last year to attend East Surry High School. Your last football games, basketball games, baseball games. Your last 1st semester, last 2nd semester, last first day of school,

Last Everything.

I remember walking into the doors of East Surry, my first day as a Freshman. (ew, freshmen.)

I was probably wearing some sort of tight graphic t-shirt that i thought was fashionable and some short shorts. you know, the freshman look, trying to show off all your brands. I watched the people from the grades above and thought, "they are so cool" and I am only a freshman. What I would have done to be a Senior, Junior or even Sophomore; ANYTHING but fresh-meat.

And of course I had the mentality of "you were a freshman once, give us a break" 

I was right. they once were freshman and so was I. Yes its sometimes even hard for me to believe that I was a freshman, not my proudest moment, but you have to start somewhere right?

All the pretty Senior girls were SO cool, and SO pretty.

It was totally unfair. All of us freshman, we knew their names, but they didn't know ours.

Now I'm the Senior, I'm the one who doesn't know over 10 of the freshmens' names. I see people I have never seen before everyday; and just like my Seniors (the ones that were seniors when I was a freshman), I don't care, I'm absorbed into my senior world of Senior privileges and rituals, of "last times" and living it up while we're young, and making the memories that consist of "the best years of your life" (yeah right). 

and guess what?

 I AM LOVING IT

every single second of it.

Yeah that's right I'm the top dog, a Senior, THE Senior.

I can sit here and tell you:

"I'm so ready to graduate" 

"I hate this place" 

"I want to leave"

"Ha, the best years of your life? Yeah right" 

Well about 2 of those statements are true, I AM ready to leave and I DO hate this place, and not just a small hate, an Immense and Atrocious  hate that reminds you every moment how much you want to get away and never come back.

but i am NOT ready to graduate.

Graduation?

I'm walking across that stage?

I'm wearing a cap and gown? 

Seriously? 

Yes, seriously. 

Pretty soon we will be getting our caps, gowns and tassels and I will be wracking my brain to find the most perfect dress for the most perfect day that will end up being covered up by an ugly gown and I will stress about my hair that will get matted down by the cap and I will get smacked in the face by my tassel, and I will trip but most of all i WILL cry.

i will cry so hard.

That all-consuming cry with tears of joy, sadness, freedom and reality.

I will cry before, during and after graduation, yes, I know will.

and I WILL choke on all the words I said about wanting to leave so bad, and I will wish I did things differently, and I will miss East Surry, even though it pains me deeply to say that now.

but I will.

I will have a lot of "told you so's" from my parents, family members, and my friends that are graduates about wishing my high school years away, but most of all I will look back and think some day:

Those were the best days.

I have made amazing memories and friends here.

Some that I will and some that I wont tell my children.

And I honestly can't deny that I have had a blast this past year.

I don't want it to end.

My life is about to change so drastically and I don't even realize it.

I sit here and say this to you so emotionally, yet I still live each day like I have one more year at East Surry simply because I cannot wrap my mind around the fact that in a total of 5 months its over.

But in reality what is over?

Its only a unfamiliar and broad beginning.

Look out world, here I come.

Shout out to the Senior Class of 2013.

If we can make it through hell, we can make it through anything.

Who you've been isn't who you have to be

Truth be told, I knew there was bad, but I knew the good overcame it.

Why can't I see that anymore?

God, I need a sign, I need wisdom, I need help.

I'm crying out to you.

Lord, speak to my mind, heart, and spirit and allow me to know what it is that you want me to do...

She's a sweet disaster

I'm not perfect.

Far from it, actually.

I dream big.

I sing too loud.

I dance provocativly.

I talk too much.

I walk fast.

I eat a lot.

I sleep too much.

I am lazy.

I am outspoken.

I talk back.

I mess up.

I make mistakes.

I cry.

I laugh SO loud.

I make a scene.

I have no cares.

I wear what I want.

I do what I want.

I don't let people run over me.

I cuss.

I yell.

I don't think before I speak.

I don't think before I do.

But most of all,

I 'm a sweet disaster,

.....and awesome.

Daddy's Day.

Alan Terry Joyce, daddy, father, padre, daddy-o, a t cool j, dad;
i want to start off by saying Happy Fathers Day to the best daddy in the world! i hope you enjoy it.
there are so many things i want to say but i don't know how.
1) you re a great dad! that's simple. you have a hard job to hold up. you provide for our family very well, and i cant be more thank full for that.
2) you stuck around. being a dad can be and is scary. most dads don't make it this far, i am so glad you did. i cant imagine my life i with out you.
3) you raised me right. you have made me the kind, courteous person i am today. you have taught me to love God, the outdoors and family. you've been a role model, showing me respect, love and compassion. you've raised me to be a down-home country girl, and i love that more than anything.
As i am growing up and realizing what is important and what isn't i see the "you" in me. we are so much alike, i mean for heavens sake look at our freaky Joyce feet, and our initials. (: we aren't as close as some father daughter relationships, but i pray that someday we will be.
Daddy, i will always be your little girl, no matter how old i look. i am still that little rowdy girl inside. (: Yes, i get a little bit of an attitude sometimes, and i snap at you and mom but i want you to know i don't mean it. i am a hormonal teenage girl, sorry.
we're both growing up, and learning, hang in there. i am about to graduate in 2 years. can you believe it daddy? Ive waited for this time my whole life. aren't you proud? but don't you worry, no matter how far away college is i will never forget where i came from. i promise i will be back, to this sleepy ole town, the town that made me.
you inspire me in so many ways, and you hold our family together; i love that. things are always changing: clothes, phones, technology, but one thing that will never change is how much i love my daddy.
there is no way humanly possible to thank you enough for anything and everything you've done and do for me.
I Love You So So SO much, dad. words cant come close to explaining.
Love, Your little girl. <3

One last breath.

as humans we tend to live life like we have many years ahead of us, when truly, we arent promised anything.

..one of my friends was in a bad car accident,

Daniel Hoover pulled out of Wal-Mart in Elkin, and was t-boned on his side of the car.

this opened my eyes so much,

things happen, that you would never expect in a million years,

do you think he thought as he pulled out, a car could hit me, i could have an accident, i could die..

what if you just took your last breath, what if you had an accident, what if your mom or dad just took their last breath, what if you never got to tell your bestfriend goodbye before she died.

we dont realize how unforgiving this life is.

tend to fill ourselves up with useless materialistic things that we think make us happy.

we have this comfort that this world will treat us right, but in all seriousness, its out to get us.

cheating us, scamming us, decieving us, filling our heads with false information.

you never know when your time will come, and you need to be ready.

be strong the Lord, and know you will spend forever with him. 

make a relation ship so beautiful, and to trusting, that no one or nothing can come between..

..cause you never know when you might take your last breath.

O Lord, You are my God; I will exalt You, I will praise Your name, for You have done wonderful things, even purposes planned of old in faithfulness and truth.

Isaiah 25: 1

to the woman called Mama.

This is to the woman that made me, the woman that raised me, the woman that introduced me to this crazy world. This is to the woman i respect the most, the woman that keeps me strong, the woman that will never break. This is to the woman that held me when i would shed a tear, that would give all i could ever dream of, to the woman that would go to the end of the world for me. This is to the woman that called me the funniest names, the woman that gave me the greatest memories, to the woman that made me her world and more.

And now i finally realized that that woman is Mother, my Mommy, my Mom, my Mama.

Theres things as a kid that you'll never forget, there are things you'll never remember; 

Mom's never forget; You never forget, you never have.

There is so much i haven't seen my whole life, and that was this wonderful woman that lays her head down at night, in the room right beside me. I was looking but i wasn't seeing. I wasn't seeing the way i have your curls, the way i have your eyes, the way we're so much alike. I wasn't seeing how much you give up for me, how you put up such a fight for me, how you never left my side. I wasn't seeing how blessed i was, how good i had it, how amazing you were and are to me. It's sad that its took me 15 years to see that. 

..Yeah, i saw it, i told you i loved you and that you were the best mommy, and i meant it every time. But I've never really meant it like i do now. 

I'm 15 now, and I'm growing up, and it's so easy to see the you in me. I'm thinking like you, and talking like you, and shining like you. Remember how everyone told you I would shine one day? You put that light in me, and you made that light shine. 

You know how you used to tell me that I grow up too fast, and i never believed it one time; well I'm getting older now, and i know what you meant. When we're little we want freedom and want to be old and make our own decisions, but when you finally get there its not as great as you picture it; more stress, more choices, more responsibility. There is nothing i wouldn't give to be a little kid again, and boy i wouldn't even complain one bit about being little. You gave me the world, and i didn't want it, i just wanted to be older and now that I'm here, i want it back. Im a Sophomore in high school, Mom can you believe it? i grew like a weed didn't i? That's what you used to always tell me. 

remember how you put up the fight of your life for me, and when i was finally here it was like nothing else mattered?

remember how you held my hand with the pinky on the back of my wrist?

remember how i always picked flowers for you?

remember how i started pre-school and screamed and cried for my mama, and you left in some kind of, what i used to think, terrible place and how it killed you?

remember how that first day of kindergarden i couldn't wait to get out of the car, and you cried on the way to work?

remember how i sang at the PTA productions and you always came and saw me?

remember how you helped me make the coolest pumpkin that won 1st place?

remember how i graduated from 5th grade and i thought i was the top dog?

remember how i was scared to death of the thought of middle school?

remember my rebel attitude stage, and how you loved me anyway?

remember my 8th grade graduation, when i cried cause i was finally going to  high school?

remember how happy i was to be a freshman

remember how that boy broke my heart and you listened to my sobs and were there for me?

remember how the other day in the car when i talked to you about how when your little you want to be old, but when you get here you want it back? i cried but i didn't let you see.

Do you remember?

Remember how you made these past 15 years the best years they could ever be?

Mama, I may grow of out my shoes, my bed, my clothes, and even my pj's, but there is one thing i'll never grow out of..

 ..that is my love for my Mama.

I love how you sang to me, how you told me jokes, how you tickled me, how you let me play outside, how you jumped on the trampoline with me, how you brought barney to my party, and so much more. 

You know i love you so im going to thank you;

Thank you for being so patient with me. Thank you for youre great since of humor, and thank you for ALL the times you made me laugh. Thank you for the wisdom you showed me. Thank you for being understanding, and encouraging me to do my best and be my best. Thank you for being not only my mom, but my bestfriend. Thank you for every single thing you have done for me, i cannot thank you enough for all the things you do in my life. Thank you SO much for making me the girl i am today, and for making me so much like you. <3

I love you so much, and you are the best mama i could ask for. 

God has truly blessed me with the absolute best mama.

-Love, T.J. boofiea.