Three things,

There are three things in life that bug me the most:

-liars

-hypocrites

-selfish people.

Nothing gets me going quite like those three things do.

like it is honestly, terrible.

i hate it, i hate it, i hate it.

and it just so happens that this very month of march has swarmed me with these three things.

March is the worst month 

I am dearly sorry if your birthday is in march,

I know God has a plan for me, and i know He knows what he is doing,

It all is just not making sense now..

i hate it.

"i will trust and not be afraid"

Do you know how it feels when you heart tells you one thing and your mind tells you another?

its a constant tug between the two aspects. 

its like an uphill battle, you keep trying to fight, but when you fall down you roll down the hill, even farther than you were  before.

when you get hit, you get hit hard.

and its that kind of thing that tear people apart, and tear people down.

all the threads that i thought would hold me together are slowly unraveling.

there is one difference between me and many others with the same problem.

I turn to God.

and thats the one thing that keeps me together;

that is the one thread that hasn't unraveled;

the one thread that hasn't broken.

Through it all, one person has been on my side.

God.

He works wonders, and makes miracles happen;

and his mercy is so amazing, 

He doesnt discriminate between color, race, popularity, money, nothing.

He loves us all, e v e r y single one of us, unconditionally.

and He has never once failed to be here for e v e r y one of us.

Here lately i feel like i can never do anything right, like i keep fighting for what i want or need and it just completely backfires on me.

i feel like i put so much into things and the crumble right in front of my face; 

every time..

and im getting worn down from it, im starting to loose interest in everything i do. Im waiting and putting myself behind everyone, im just waiting around for some miracle to happen; 

im tired of trying

im tired of loosing everything

im tired of getting built up to just be broke down

im tired of wasting my time

im tired of waiting..

and i feel like i cant do it anymore 

and everything that once mattered so much to me just seems useless.

through it all, i have God and need to see that.

"Surely God is my salvation; i will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation."

Isaiah 12:2-3

Goodnight, Godbless.<3

Gods beautiful world.

i spend all day adoring the thing the dear Lord blessed us with,

..our world, our outdoors, nature..

everything is so beautiful, and we take it for granted, all of us.

These are all my photos, btw. 

i ventured outside along with my camera, and took a walk, i swear i walked for hours and just admired everything that the good Lord blessed us.

i never knew how beautiful and amazing the world was,

i did when i was little, of course. 

i would sit and observe everything, and ask, 

"why daddy?" "how does it do that?" "thats so cool"

and as i grew up, my love for everything grew smaller and smaller, i got sucked into this little thing called life. 

the phones, the internet, the money, the popularity, the friends, the parties, the cars, the houses, the perfect lifestyle; and faster than you know it, the little country grown girl was gone into oblivion.

The girl that appreciated anything and everything was gone, she was lost in the world made of bigger and better things.

when i was little i spent countless hours outside, in the woods, at the river, in the creek, in the garden, running thru the fields, playing in mud holes, making awesome club houses, discovering the world.

oh how i yearned to explore every inch of it; and i WAS determined to do it.

id come inside with cuts on my legs, from the briars and trees that scratched me, yet i didnt care; every one of them had a story behind it. just like battle scars, and i had them and i loved talking about them.
my cousins and i would go into the woods just as the sun came up, and would play in them until the sun went down. 
it was a different world for us, and we loved it.
we pretended we were indians, or we were animals, and we loved it.
we loved the outdoors and we spent every waking hour outside, until it was time for bed.
when hunting season our parents would tell us not to play in the woods, 
"what?! no playing in the woods?! are you crazy?!" we would yell.
and we did it anyways. yeahh.. we got yelled at, but we didnt care.
i could go on for days and tell you stories that happened.
that same girl that im talking about, is starting to realize how great our world is.
and i found that girl in me today.


on my journey, i just started walking, i walked our fourwheeler trails, to my old club houses, to fields i played in, to creeks i got muddy in, to places i once made memories; 
and i just reminisced; i cried, i laughed, and just let myself take it all in.
i dont ever want to forget those days, everrrrr.
then i walked places ive never walked before, and i just let God guide me.
and i made the connection that, that walk was just like life.
sometimes theres two paths, and you dont know which one to take, and it might take you where you dont want to go; and you experience things, and learn to love them. 


The people in Japan lost their beautiful earth, and all of a sudden when they opened their eyes it was all gone, in a mess.
think about the tribes in africa, if they step out of their territory, they get shot,
or people in the middle east, that show their face anywhere and get murdered. 
some people do not have the pleasure to step out their door and smell the fresh air, or see a vast of greenery.
they smell smoke, dead bodies, industry, car exhaust, the smell of destruction.
and its sad.


God granted us with the beauty of our earth, and were slowly tearing it apart.
I am so thankful that God has blessed me with the eyes to notice the little things, and the heart to love them.


Im a country girl, wanting that country heart back.


Thank you Lord so much for everything you bless us with,
Thank you for this glorious place you allow us to live one,
Thank you for allowing me to see things this way,
Thank you Lord for all you do. 
<3


Goodnight, & GodBless. <3

simplicity.

I have discovered that simplicity is one thing that i adore.
Simple people, simple clothes, simple life, simple simple simple.
yes, interesting is nice, but i like simple. 
you dont have to wow me.
gosh this is so hard to put into words.
perfectly simple. (:

there is one person in my life that i cherish, his name is red.
he is perfectly simple, and i love everything about that.
i don't have to be all dressed up around him, i don't have to play it cool around him, i don't have to pretend, i can be simply myself and he loves it, just the way i am. i am starting to realize that that is how i want to be, simply simple. I love being around red, i would spend every hour of the day with him if i could, cause everything is so simple and genuine and i just am in love with it. there is nothing that i love in this world more than a good talk and just bonding with someone, just letting everything go and letting all my emotions escape. I just want to get stuck in that moment forever where everything is simple.
here lately i've been thinking about time, and how you're only in one moment for that one moment and its gone, you cant go back and relive it or bring it back, its gone forever. you're only this old once, and you're closer to death every second,
it really blows my mind,  


im tired, im going to bed before i think myself to death. 


GODbless.<3